Saturday, May 29, 2010

impossible to be a gentleman?

I went to Target the other day...I can't remember why. There probably wasn't a reason, and seriously...do I really need one? ;)

Anywho....I walked up to the door. You know, the automatic sliding ones. This man is walking up at the same time, but instead of walking through the doors, he stops. I look at him with a bewildered look on my face, thinking "come on dude, the doors open for you." Turns out he wasn't crazy...just chivalrous...

He stopped, made a sweeping motion toward the door with his hand and said, "Here, let me get that door for you."

I laughed a little, said "thank you" and walked on in. Then from behind me I heard him say, to no one in particular...

"They make it impossible to be a gentleman anymore."

I literally stopped and looked back at him...he had moved on and wasn't even talking to me anymore, but I was so shocked and, literally, halted by what he said.

They make it impossible to be a gentleman anymore.

Really? Did society and technology and innovation take away their chances to be polite, chivalrous, and just...well, manly?

Doors open themselves.

Roadside assistance is a phone call away.

Valet's open car doors.

Movers lift heavy boxes.

The lady (or man...I can never tell) at Wal-Mart fixes my car.

So have we taken away their opportunities to serve us in those small but huge ways?

I think that, just maybe...we have.

Understand that I'm not justifying the selfish, stupid actions of guys who are flat out jerks. That's not ok....uncool....unattractive....stupid.

However.

A few months ago I heard Mrs. Beth :) talk about how just like it's the heart of every girl to be the heroine, the princess, the "it" girl in the happy ending...it's the heart of every boy and man to be the hero, to save the day, the hour...or even just the moment. So I'm wondering...

Are we stealing their chances?

Of course guys can still get creative and find a way...but here's my question:

In all of our technological progress, are we pushing away the possibility of an uprising of strong, Godly, servant-hearted men?

My mind and heart have been reeling about this for days...so, your thoughts-

Share them with me :)

2 comments:

Uncanny Colleen said...

Oooo..ooooo...I loved this post! Raising four boys, I have certainly become aware of the fact that our little guys have to BE TAUGHT how to be gentlemen. And, it is also often necessary to FORCE people to let them be little gentlemen.

For example, at church, we typically see the same group of people in and around the elevators. I always try to make sure that the guys let the ladies in (or out) of the elevator first. And, I can not even remember how many times I have had to nearly argue with someone to the point that I have to say, "No, really! I WANT them to let you go first! I am trying to teach them the concept of 'Ladies First'!" Once I have practically drawn the line in the sand, then the ladies will say something along the lines of "Oh, I see. How nice." However, it doesn't seem to fare as well with the middle-aged ladies as with the generation that my grandparents are in. Those are the ones that are genuinely impressed and quite surprised to see parents bent on raising gentlemen.

Are my guys perfect? Heck, NO! But, Larry and I are working on having them be chivalrous and socially adept.

By the way, we are also intent on increasing the number of young men that do not find it appropriate or funny to belch and 'pop' in public (at least by four). You would be astonished at how even young ladies (if you can refer to them as that), think that this is quite hilarious. Gross me out the door (to quote my 7 year old)!

Uncanny Colleen said...

I had a chance to lay still and pray for a long time yesterday. I thought of you and prayed for you and a certain gentlemen (which, I don't know yet).

Love you so much that I can hardly stand it!